Why moms should not join the gym

Posted on March 13, 2012 by thesatisficingmom

The life a mom is stretched – we juggle all the time with the job, the children, the house activities – and there is few time for ourselves, if any. But the pressure to be healthy and looking good is also there – and we then feel tempted to get some ‘me-time’ and dedicate it to the gym. But as a mom that needs to maximize both time and money, there is no advantages on going to the gym:

  • It is pricey – gym usually have quite high-priced memberships – we get convinced that we are making a great deal by paying for a year or so – just to realize later on what we already knew, that we had no time to enjoy the place and we just go once in a while to relief ourselves from the guilty from paying for it
  • It is crowded – yes, you and most of the other users have the same idea – to use the facilities at lunch time or just before / after office hours. You stay longer waiting to use the equipment that actually doing the exercises
  • It might not make you feel good about yourself - at the gym you will compare yourself (and be compared) with women that are many years younger than you and/or with much more time to dedicate to their bodies – and this will not make you feel better about your self-image

That absolutely does not mean we should not make exercises: it is important for our healthy – and so for our children. I believe it is also our job as a mom to give example to our children on keeping physically active and make this part of their lives.

  • Incorporate exercise in your and your children daily lives – there are many ways of doing it and no one-size-fits-all here. Walk to whenever you can (to the school, the nursery, your office, the supermarket), make cleaning the house part of your exercise routine (vacuum, clean the windows)
  • Explore sport activities with your children – there are many activities that are suitable for adults and children, adapting according to the age (swimming, trekking, horse back ridding, cycling, kicking a ball in the backyard). You might not get the best workout ever, but you will be enjoying time together with your children and will also teach them by example how you can have fun in a physical activity

What is your favorite mom/children exercise? How do you incorporate exercise in your daily life?

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What a mother should not do at work

Posted on March 5, 2012 by thesatisficingmom

Working mother, toys and laptopIn most companies, mothers have a hard time conciliating motherhood and their jobs. The reality is that as much as the woman loves and is brilliant in her job, after she become a mom, not only she has less time and energy to dedicate to the job, but her priorities also change.  In any case, nobody wants to work hard and don’t be recognized because she is sending the wrong messages.  In order not to be overlooked for career opportunities or seen as less committed than their colleagues, mothers need to be extra careful in their behavior in the office:

  • Don’t talk too much about your children in the office – specially not the nasty bits – when your colleagues ask you about your children, they are being nice, but they don’t want details. And it is too personal to share
  • Of course you can have pictures and draws from your children in your office, but refrain yourself from exposing too much. Save most of them to your home, or make a digital folder you can visit on your own
  • Avoid commenting about your broken nights, complicated morning routine, childcare issues and so on – tough it is all normal administration for a mom, your colleagues might see you as a person with a too complicated personal life and it might be used against you
  • If you need to talk with your children, the childcare, the pediatrician, etc during office hours, be discrete – if you are lucky enough to have a door, close it and be quick; if you work in an open office, try to go to a private room to make the call, without announcing it to your colleagues
  • When you need to be absent to attend appointments in the childcare, school, pediatrician, etc, be discreet in the communication (meaning, communicate you will be absent due to an issue regarding your children, but not too many details) and try to compensate the hours
  • If you work from home, in the night, be sure that your manager knows about it. This work is usually taken for granted and not recognized
Recognition in corporations is about achievement and dedication, but it is also about how we communicate and expose ourselves. 

What is your experience as a working mother? Have you seen cases that could be avoided with a bit of extra care?

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Starting with bilingual education

Posted on February 27, 2012 by thesatisficingmom

Language, blilingualAs I live in a foreign country – in which the official language is not English and neither my mother tongue – my little girl is learning languages since an early age. I speak to her in my mother tongue, she goes to nursery where they speak the local language and we do activities with friends in English. It is working, and I am very proud that she can switch quite quickly and naturally among those languages.

It all take a bit of persistence and effort – as it most of the things in life. But not as much as it might look like. Some tips on how to start are:

1. You don’t need to know the second language – but it is helpful. No need to be your mother tongue or that you are proficient, any level will give you some tools to support your children on their chores, find material, etc.

2. Find a community that speaks the language – it can be quite hard to motivate your children to learn a foreign language just based on hypothetical future career benefits. Try to find a community, does not matter the size of it, that your children can join. It can be a play group, a community that meets every Sunday afternoon to play soccer in the park, or even some playdates that you can set up on your own home or in the nearby playground.

3. Diversify – grammar exercises and vocabulary building are very important, but learning a language is a long distance run, so it is more important to keep the children motivated and engaged. Go to the internet, the bookstores, the library and look for music, movies, cartoons, small theater sets, maps, etc.

4. Praise your children – it is hard work to learn a foreign language, even for smart children. The best incentive ever is to praise them – for their efforts and for the results. Do that and your children will feel always more incentive to keep learning.

Do you raise your children bilingual? What are your experiences?

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You must try it before you can say if you like it or not

Posted on February 22, 2012 by thesatisficingmom

Toddlers can be very pick eaters and often reject food even before they try it. As a good mom, I keep cooking healthy nice things for my daughter – and try to make her have a go. I repeat over and over ‘you must try it before you can say if you like it or not’ – and well, sometimes it works.

Well, it was my time then – not with food, but with a wild thing, crafting. I had to prepare my daughter a carnival costume of an animal – sounds simple, no? Not for me. As much as I am good in figures and presentations, I am bad at crafting. My own mom is a genius on all these kind of thing, but I am a complete mess. Completely out of necessity and to avoid my daughter to be the only poor child without a proper costume in the nursery, I searched for some materials, some inspiration and put my sewing machine on the kitchen table. In the end, the results are not perfect but it was not so terrible. And I really enjoyed making it!

 

So, this is one more lesson I learned from my daughter – before you say that you don’t like something, or that you are not able to make something, you must try it.

 

Is there anything that you would like to try today?


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Preparing for spring

Posted on February 20, 2012 by thesatisficingmom

For people in that side of the Equator, spring is still quite far away – at least another 5-6 weeks until we get there or the surrounds. But we need to start getting into the mood – specially if we want to be at our best to enjoy spring when it comes. Because when the weather really turns warmer and sunnier, we don’t want to stay indoors anymore, and neither wearing the winter clothes. It is still too early for gardening or clean up the balcony, but there are some things that we can do to getting ready:

1. Organize your pantry: go through the kitchen pantry and make a good check in what is expired or about to expire, clean the shelves, organize things by likeness – all grains, pasta, etc together. It takes some time to be done but it is really worth it – time and money saved for the months to come.

2. Clean up the kitchen cupboards – and get hid of at least some of the things that you have not used in the last couple of years and are unlikely to use the the next couple. If you don’t want to get hid of them, try to find another place to it, such as in the garage or the storage room. Having organized cupboards are also time saving.

3. Get your bicycle checked – many people do not cycle regularly in winter, so it is a good time to bring the bicycle to maintenance, to have it ready for spring/summer. Same for all other likewise equipment – Nordic walking sticks, backpacks, kids carriers and such.

4. Purge the kids summer stuff – your kids grown since last time you used the spring / summer clothes and equipment, so it is time to go through it, get rid of what does not fit anymore and make a list of what you need to get for next season.

5. Shop for some spring clothes – in most stores it is already spring in their windows, so it is time for you to select some nice outfits for you and your children and have them ready in your wardrobe waiting for the temperature to rise.

6. Plan your summer holidays – early birds usually get cheaper flights and have a better choice of hotels and dates in their destinations. So, start to research and book in advance. The only though of a summer holiday already put us in a summer mood.

As we progress towards Eastern, we will get the house and ourselves ready for the outdoors season.

What else are you planning to do to get ready for spring?

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